SAM IS GRAND

Around the first the first of April I signed up on a Internet dating site, Plenty of Fish http://www.pof.com/. A girlfriend, Lynn, recommended it to me. She said there were lots of men from our city listed.

On POF you can view who looks at your profile. I like that feature. POF is free and the profiles enable you to tell accurately about yourself with lots of good information. I noticed Sam had viewed my profile and lived about 90 miles from me. That was very doable in distance terms. Sam is 58 yrs old and never married—yes that was a RED FLAG. He was nice looking, good work history, and his profile was very articulate.

We started emailing at the first of May. Here is his first email telling me what he liked:

hi M

I like mexican food, italian, steak single malt scotch, Merlot..chocolate 50-60's
R&R, c& W, some classical movies, plays self employed & volunteer 4WD trucks and sports cars,pets...I have one cat( two died last year)jeans/boots denim
skirts/heels

We emailed about once a day all through the month. I found out he didn’t like email, too impersonal. I couldn't’t get him to do IM’s nor did we talk on the phone, so I figured computers weren’t his favorite thing to do. That was fine with me. Sam told me we worked all the time, but wanted to “Stop and smell the roses” and was interested in meeting someone. I took that as a good sign, but soon learned yes he had his life schedule ALL the time.

Sam asked me if we could meet. Hooray!!! He wanted to wait until June, when my schedule was more open, his too. He said he would be fine coming to my city and meeting. I was excited that a date had finally been set, but I would have to wait 2 weeks…darn!

The librarian in me wanted more details about Sam, since his emails where very small in content. My gut told me he would not be a serial killer, but I was curious. Sam lived in a city that I had my first job in back in 1980. Small world. The detective in me wanted accurate background info on Sam. There are dozens of websites where you can do a detailed check of public records for a fee. The fee and how in depth vary. I use the same company often (http://www.intelius.com/) The report came back clean—no tickets, court cases, etc. In this day and age, you can’t know too much about someone. I like to feel safe. I did find out he lived on the SAME street I lived on in 1980!!! Oh my….. I took that as a good omen.

The Saturday before we were supposed to have lunch I drove to his city for some recon. I looked at his house and office. Sam’s home was beautiful and looked about the same age as mine. He seemed to be the “whole package” and I hoped lunch went well.

On June 5th, we meet for lunch. Sam called and said he was running late, very nice touch. I appreciated it. We parked right next to each other, got out of the car at the same time, and recognized each other immediately. It was very exciting. He was nice on the eyes. I could tell by his smile he liked me. Lunch was fun. We talked freely and openly-adult to adult. We both agreed we wanted to talk further. I knew he was safe, so we went to my house. I’m so glad I cleaned up before hand. The next 2 hrs flew by as we talked about everything. Sam told me he liked me. I got two goodbye kisses and a hug…life is good!

Over the next two weeks, Sam has called pretty regularly but we haven’t seen each other again and that bothers me. It became clear that Sam’s life is scheduled to the max every day. He had no free nights during those two weeks. I had to be honest and tell him a relationship takes a time commitment or how can you get to know each other? He was a little put out with me for asking why we couldn't’t get together—all his commitments. I sent him emails telling him how I felt a well rounded relationship should be so he would know where I was coming from. Sam is a nice guy but my gut tells me he doesn’t know how to have a strong relationship. He maybe is afraid or doesn’t know how to do it. In time, I will find out. Deep down I feel he is worth waiting out…..and everyone knows…”patience” is not my forte at ALL.

Today I’m hoping Sam will call. He has been in Dallas for the last four days. I know he is busy Tuesday thru Thursday at night, but just maybe the weekend is free? Just maybe I will see him. I do have hope.